Something's Wrong With Me

I'm sick. Something has to be wrong with me.

Everyday, I'm exhausted to the point where I feel I'm going to faint. I can't eat well  anymore and every time I do, I get nausea. I'm not anorexic. 

I lost 10lbs in the last month, but at least it was from my belly.

I sleep 4 hours a night and work or go to school for 10 hours a day with no break. I only have Sundays off.

I've had a cough for a month now. Strep throat a month ago. No antibiotics or anything because I have no insurance or money.

I don't think I'm sick. I'm just overstressed, overworked and an emotional wreck.

I don't feel happy honestly. I really don't have fun anymore and I'm alone about 95% of the time when I'm not at work or school. 

The drama with the ex is stressing me out. I'm worried about him and want to be friends, but it's all or nothing. Now his sister's involved and she's making things worse.

He thinks I'm dating a coworker at Starbucks and that I'm having the time of my life. Both far from the truth. I guess if you can't be friends if both bat for the same team. 

I don't do anything. I watch TV and surf the net all evening, occasionally playing video games that I'm bored of.

Both my jobs suck. I like Starbucks and I have fun, but so much drama. I'm a veteran there and I'm one of the least paid too. Someone whose been there for 2 months makes more than I. I think I'm sick because of it. 

Making Waves is dying. I'm burnt-out and it's painfully boring. But I can't do anything because I need to pay rent and bills. Doubt I can find anything better with this economy.

I don't know what I'm going to do. 

I'm just sick and tired of being sick and tired. 

The only thing really making me happy is my Microbiology class. At least I can say I'm not stupid. I'm #1 in the class still and I really enjoy the topic. 

Also my iPod. My escape into LaLaland with stories only lyrics create. My storybook. Thanks Lady Gaga. I've mastered the Poker Face. I hide everything well. 

This is random. No point in making paragraphs, just write how I feel. 

Hopefully I'll see better days soon, but right now it's not looking too bright.